ALIVE!! ONCE MORE I RISE FROM THE GRAVE!!
Yeah. So, once again I somewhat reluctantly (for some reason) reactivate this journal. I have a need to talk about things that I can only talk about on this semi-obscure channel. For some reason, the fact that outside awarenesses can read things here, even if it is only a few, makes a difference to me. I don't entirely like it. But for whatever reason, I seem to want it. So here we are.
Perhaps it's a reluctance...I even reluctantly type these words...a reluctance to integrate my entire identity. That plus reluctance to accept the fact that I even need to communicate with other people. Of course, talking to people only on the internet often feels like communicating with phantoms.
Argh...fighting the urge to delete all these words...I often do that...not as often as Nathan Explosion, but often enough. It seems pointless and weak and therefore vulnerable and therefore to be immediately destroyed before it is attacked. My anxieties again?
Obviously I'm giving myself leeway to be self-indulgent. Perhaps that's the point of this journal: to indulge in talking about things that I don't normally talk about.
You'll note I'm not mentioning any fanfiction (though I just did: paradox! boom)...I'm more working on originalfic right now, in fits and starts.
Ugh...tired...as I am sick right now, I am also weak. Must sleep. Will probably post more in the future, the near future. Like tomorrow.
JUST IN CASE I RELAPSE: since last post in 2011(??!!) much life under the bridge. Doing semi-okay right now. Still feeling like I need to get to the next level.
IF YOU READ THIS (and care): WASSUP??! Leave a post and let me know.